01 2月

人生短短

​偶尔在Instapaper的上中读到此文,读完令我感触颇多。在征得原作者的同意后,截取部分译而分享之。水平不足,请多指教。

人生短短

如果人生很短,那我们更应期待着这短暂中的Suprise。而事实往往就是这样,许下一个承诺,然后转身便忘的一干二净。

好比,你永远觉得你随时可以开始写一本书,去爬一座山,或者随便干点什么。直到某一天老天给了你一个Suprise,使你再也没有可能去做这些。

这其中最伤心的,莫过于身边人的过世——只是因为他们的生命也是短暂的。

我母亲死后,我时常后悔没有多花一些时间陪她。我过得就好似她就一直在那一样,时常会想起她对我教导的样子,似乎一个只要开车便能去见到她。可惜,那只不过是我的一厢情愿罢了。

想必,不少人应该犯过和我一样的错误吧。

或许,避免这样错误发生的方法便是养成一个习惯——去做你最想去做的事的习惯。

如果想爬山,那就去爬;如果想写书,那就写;如果想去看你妈,那就赶紧去看,别犹豫。

人生不需要那么多的思考。立马去做便是

其实,你平日的生活方式大大影响着你的寿命长短。而这些大多数人可以做到更好。我亦如是。

你可以花些时间统计你平日每日的时间花费如何。让日子过得像流水一样很容易,只需要行程单上堆满杂事,但那真的是你要的人生吗?

我倒有一个可以让时间过得更慢点方法,那就是陪伴孩子。当你孩子还小的时候,有些时刻你会永生难忘。

这真的很有用。

有时候我甚至在想为什么对于我母亲的过世很伤心,只是因为我本可以陪她做更多的事情,然而我却并没有。如今,我最大的儿子马上7岁了。而每当我想起他三岁时候的样子时,我并没有任何悔意。因为那段他三岁时的片段永远烙印在我俩的脑海里。
人生那么短,别再把时间花在无谓的人和事情上了。

好好珍惜吧。

 

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所谓无谓的人和事,不过是思考下这些人与事在未来会不会对你产生影响。例如作者举了个例子,大多数的高中学生经常被搞不好与同学的关系而困扰。可是待这些学生成年后再问及此事,都显现出不屑一顾及觉得自己会为这样的事困扰而觉得幼稚的想法。

 

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摘取部分原文如下    

If life is short, we should expect its shortness to take us by surprise. And that is just what tends to happen. You take things for granted, and then they’re gone. You think you can always write that book, or climb that mountain, or whatever, and then you realize the window has closed. The saddest windows close when other people die. Their lives are short too. After my mother died, I wished I’d spent more time with her. I lived as if she’d always be there. And in her typical quiet way she encouraged that illusion. But an illusion it was. I think a lot of people make the same mistake I did.

Perhaps a better solution is to look at the problem from the other end. Cultivate a habit of impatience about the things you most want to do. Don’t wait before climbing that mountain or writing that book or visiting your mother. You don’t need to be constantly reminding yourself why you shouldn’t wait. Just don’t wait.
How you live affects how long you live. Most people could do better. Me among them.

But you can probably get even more effect by paying closer attention to the time you have. It’s easy to let the days rush by. The “flow” that imaginative people love so much has a darker cousin that prevents you from pausing to savor life amid the daily slurry of errands and alarms. One of the most striking things I’ve read was not in a book, but the title of one: James Salter’s Burning the Days.

It is possible to slow time somewhat. I’ve gotten better at it. Kids help. When you have small children, there are a lot of moments so perfect that you can’t help noticing.

It does help too to feel that you’ve squeezed everything out of some experience. The reason I’m sad about my mother is not just that I miss her but that I think of all the things we could have done that we didn’t. My oldest son will be 7 soon. And while I miss the 3 year old version of him, I at least don’t have any regrets over what might have been. We had the best time a daddy and a 3 year old ever had.

Relentlessly prune bullshit, don’t wait to do things that matter, and savor the time you have. That’s what you do when life is short.